Change is rough. It’s soul snatching , gut wrenching. It’s unnerving. Change is confusing. Change is scary. On the flip side, change is necessary. It can be painful yet so beautiful. It’s exciting and fruitful. Without change, growth can not occur. Life can not truly and fully be lived without change.
I know that I have not posted in a while. I fell out of love with myself. I hated where I was in life. I had reached my bottom point. Living my life another day the way it was, was one day too long. I was fed up. Overwhelmed at a a job that no longer suited me. Underwhelmed with my adult progression. Still caring pain and distrust from relationships that have dissolved within the past two years. I was so sick of my routine that my desire to do differently overcame my fear of change. In my hopelessness, I found my strength.
Sometimes, something major has to rock your world enough for you to desire change. Other times, it’s the repetitiveness of the routine that slowly but surely murders your happiness. Often, it can be a mixture of the two.
I stepped out on faith and found a new job. I stepped out on faith and traded my old car for a new one. 2017 is about moving in faith for me. Now, don’t be confused. Life has been rough. I’m adjusting to being at a new company. I turned 25. I was close to being homeless. I am in the process of trying to find an apartment, so I can move out of my parents’ place. I’m still scared. Don’t think that I have everything together. I’m learning how to trust God to carry me. My piece of mind was worth the change. I’m hopeful about the direction in which I’m heading.
It took me being in a space where I was not appreciated to recognize my worth. You don’t have to settle for misery. You dictate your life. You can stop, move, or switch up at ANY point. We get a limited amount of days on this earth. Use them wisely. Time is precious. Love is precious. Struggle won’t last long. Be willing to let go and let God.
For a while now, I have felt like I’ve outgrown so much in my life. Nothing seemed to fit. I had to completely scrap everything and start anew. I’m still adjusting but the new is refreshing. I am proud of the progress that I have made. in my sadness, I was so focused on how far I have left. I failed to appreciate how far I have come. Along the way, do not forget to celebrate the little successes!
This is my year! I’m claiming this. My year for love, my year for growth, my year for elevation!
Landside by Fleetwood Mac, famously covered by The Dixie Chicks and Sam Cooke’s A Change is Gonna Come,really inspired me to embrace what change had to offer.
Climbed a mountain and I turned around
And I saw my reflection in the snow covered hills
‘Til the landslide brought it down
Oh, mirror in the sky
What is love?
Can the child within my heart rise above?
Can I sail through the changin’ ocean tides?
Can I handle the seasons of my life?
‘Cause I’ve built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Even children get older
And I’m getting older, too
But now I think I’m able to carry on
It’s been a long, a long time coming
But I know a change is gonna come, oh yes it will